Tomorrow, September 26th, marks the beginning of 6 years abroad. I know I know. But Ari, why is this titled Lessons After 5 Years?
Well? It’s the end of the 5th year but the beginning of my 6th.
Also, I might have taken that photo before realizing I wanted only one had to be out, not two… haha
But I digress.
On this day, 5 years ago, I was being dropped off at the PDX airport with my mom, brother, and sister in law. We had just had pasta at a hip lil Italian place in NE and I had no idea what I was in for.
When I started this journey, I thought it was just going to be a break. I didn’t think it would turn into anything permanent or substantial. In fact, I fully believed that I would be “settled down” by this time.
Don’t ask me what I thought that actually meant, but I know it was a thing.
While there were several moments that made me question my sanity to live abroad… many which happened this week, there have been so many little life lessons I’ve learned along the way.
So what have I learned?
Welll, here are just a few that have been on my mind as of late…
You start to understand what matters most
While I was living in the states, I would let myself get so worked up over the smallest things. But after living in a country where the common person doesn’t understand that you want nothing more than the location of the bathroom, you start to just roll with the punches.
The amount of misunderstandings I’ve had over the past few years could fill a book, but at the end of the day, none of them really matter.
I get to wake up everyday to this beautiful life and boy am I so lucky, because it is alllll mine.
That distance really does make the heart grow fonder
After 28 years of living on this earth, I’ve pleased to say that I’ve never been closer to my mom than I am right now.
I never had a good relationship with my parents growing up. We would fight and argue about everything.
Now I realize that we needed the most was space.
Moving abroad had helped my mom realize that I am quite capable of taking care of myself. I don’t run home or call crying if something happens. I’ll take of it myself, and honestly, probably not even tell her. I think there was this big fear that if I failed, what the help would I do next? But when I didn’t come home with a one-way ticket the first year, or the third year after that, I think it really started to settle in that I was here for the long haul and that it was going to be okay after all.
Now whenever I see her, there is less dread and more excitement about the time we are going to spend together.
I really, really like teaching
This one seems a little obvious, but it was honestly one of most surprising lessons I learned. I had never wanted to be a teacher before moving abroad. And never in my life did I picture most of my days being spent hanging out with teenagers, no middle schoolers, and enjoying it.
There’s something about working hard for that look they get in their eyes when something clicks.
That moment when you know the last 5 minutes of endless explanation haven’t been for nothing.
Teaching has not only allowed me to teach students about something I love, but it’s completely changed me as a person.
As much content I’ve taught them, they’ve taught me valuable lessons in love, empathy, and the strength in vulnerability.
Believe it or not, doing things on your own isn’t scary
I used to never want to do things on my own. I had this irrational fear of being alone… like I was going to go crazy or something.
But then I moved abroad. By myself, and I had to put on my big girl panties and just suck it up.
I’ve called agencies, made my own appointments, butchered speaking Thai to get random locals to understand my needs, traveled to numerous countries, eat by myself and gone to the movies without friends on various occasions.
Being by myself has pushed be far outside my comfort zone, not because I was readying and willing, but out of necessity. And… I survived.
It’s one of those lessons that I’m not sure would have been learned without being pushed out of the nest…if you know what I mean.
Damn Ari, you gotta adult now
This lesson, might have been one of the hardest to learn haha. Somewhere between 24 and 26, no not 25, I became an adult. I’m not even sure when exactly it happened.
But I went from being able to make and get away with dumb mistakes to managing the dumb mistake makers.
I went from never taking my bike in or calling in for my own appointments, to me nagging the doctors to see me more to make sure I was better.
I went from being someone who helped take care of a sick kid to the person who called parents and organized hospital visits.
I pay my taxes and bills on time. I rent my own house!
If that’s not adulting, then y’all I really don’t know what is.
I am genuinely, so, damn, blessed
Real talk y’all. This life is such a blessing. From every single terrifying moment to moments of bliss I can still feel to this day, I feel like one of the luckiest people in the world.
Moving abroad has highlighted these blessings ten fold and over. I cannot wait to see what the next 5 years have in store.
Thank you all so much for even being a part of my life and for being here in this space.
xo
-Ari
